What: Fencing is, in essence, swordfighting for cowards. It will come as no surprise to find out that it was invented by the French.
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| The two biggest names in fencing face off |
Who: Pictured at right are the two most recognisable faces in fencing. Remember them!!
Where: In a week where purpose built stadia and venues will host the cream of world sport, fencers join boxers, wrestlers and taekwondoers in competing in the unmitigated shithole that is the ExCel Arena
How: Yera, ‘tis all a bit of faffing about, in truth. The two competitors just dance back and forth, trying to touch the other with their sword – a foil, a sabre, or an Épée, which are three separate classes. However, the swords don’t hurt, and I don’t think I can stress that enough. If you take this messing seriously, you’re probably the type to leave a suicide note before doing a bungee jump.
Do say: “He has the best in Coupé in the whole of foil fencing”
Don’t say: “Ja know who’d dominate this shit? Zorro”
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