The 'Lympics Log Off

It's always difficult to give a bit of a "Best Games Ever" tag, seeing as they're so different and so rare. It is, though, probably reasonable to say that London's will live long in the memory. Even the cynicism that had dogged the build-up had no effect whatsoever - for our hosts, a collective light went on the night on the Opening Ceremony and burned brightly for the 17 proceeding days.

From Bolt to Phelps, Shiwen to Farah, Rudisha, Hoy and plenty more besides, we saw some very special performances, and very special athletes. Tears, cheers, Kenny Egan's jackets, we could scarcely have asked for more. We'll now talk about legacy, I'm sure. We'll tune into the Paralympics in a few weeks. But for this blog, that's it folks.

London 2012. It's been real. See y'in Rio.

The What-The-Fuck-Am-I-Going-To-Do-Now Blog - Irish at the Olympics: The Final Weekend

In the field of funny names, Arthur Lanigan-O'Keeffe definitely sets a standard. In the field of ridiculous sports, the modern pentathlon is out on its own. Running and swimming - fine. Showjumping? Why? Shooting? Stupid. And Fencing? Really? Why not throw Kabaddi and hot-dog eating in there while we're at it? Either way, the legal firm managed a 25th place finish, his colleague Natalya Coyle (right) achieving an impressive ninth place in the women's event.

Another to be proud of her finish is Olive Loughnane, who came in 13th in the women's 20k walk. The real Irish story in the walking was Rob Heffernan, who just missed out on a medal after finishing fourth. Dee loneliest place in dee world, as we've said before, but a massive personal best and a top 5 finish was well received by the Corkman - as well it should. Another Leesider who enjoyed success is Andrzej Jezierski, who won the B final in the canoeing to finish ninth overall.

Decidedly less triumphant was Mark Kenneally, who finished 57th in the marathon. This is probably as cruel as it gets, as there is little more disheartening than running a full 26 miles only to have some pudgy blogger mocking your finishing position. Sport isn't fair sometimes, though, and Kenneally has to take it. The slow git.

And a reminder that sport isn't fair came in the boxing ring, as the fairytale ending we hoped for was not to be, John Joe Nevin (left) defeated by GB's Luke Campbell in the bantamweight final. Nevin was, to be fair, not at his very best - certainly in comparison to his incredible semi-final performance - and was made to pay by the home fighter. A third round knockdown put an exclamation point on matters, Campbell the victor by a scoreline of 14-11.

Ireland's final medal of the Games was not to be a golden moment, but rather a silver lining.

'Lympic Ladies #19 - Kseniya Vdovina

The law of averages is a tricky thing, especially when it comes to sport. Just because you've had 99 losses in a row does not mean a win is necessarily going to be just around the corner. Just because you're unbeaten in a while doesn't mean defeat is impossible. And just because you figure one in four blonde Russians might be lookers, it's no guarantee. This time, however, the law of averages holds strong.

The delectable Kseniya Vdovina - as well as being a heck of a Scrabble score - is a member of the Russian 4x400m relay team. Sure, she's not exactly the biggest star in athletics (or even her team) but since when does that matter? She is five-and-a-half feet of Siberian loveliness, and doesn't mind sitting in front of a lens to show it off, either.

The Russians qualified for the final tonight. Vdovina didn't even have to participate herself. That's just fucking typical, isn't it? Hot chicks just get life handed to them on a plate...

The Christ-We're-Getting-Greedy-Now Blog - Irish at the Olympics: Day 14

After Katie Taylor's heroics on Thursday - as well as Cian O'Connor's bronze Wednesday, and the medals guaranteed in the ring since Sunday - the air of pessimism and acceptance of mediocrity that defined the early stages of these Games was well and truly banished, replaced by hopes, nay, expectations, of success.

Though Andrzej Jezierski (right) - one of the Jezierskis of the Booreenmanna Road, no doubt - is a former world champion, his best days are most likely behind him, and his hopes of reaching the final of the Men's C1 was ended in Eton Dorney with a 4th place finish in his semi final. The best part of 10 hours later, the 4x400 women were on dry land, but no more successful, the team of Marian Heffernan, Joanne Cuddihy, Jessie Barr and Michelle Carey finishing well behind the pace, sixth in their heat.

So, it was the boxing ring that once again held the hopes of the nation, and John Joe Nevin (left) didn't disappoint. Quick, slick, and basing his fight around a truly phenomenal right hand, a superb performance against the reigning world champion Lazaro Alvarez Estrada saw Nevin progress to tomorrow's final. The Cuban southpaw had absolutely no answer to the clever approach adopted by the Mullingar man, who triumphed by a score of 19-14. He will now face the man who beat him in last years Worlds, Team GB's Luke Campbell, in what should be a cracking final.

It was a much needed win too, after the heartbreak just a few minutes before Nevin took the ring. Paddy Barnes, a bronze medallist from Beijing, will have another bronze to add to his collection, though it could so easily have been more. Against the formidable Zou Shiming, Barnes fought like a lion, tying the fight 15-15 on the scorecards, before a countback separated the fighters by one solitary point, 45-44. Barnes found out the hard way that one of life's golden rules continues to ring true - you always end up with a little more Chinese than you can manage.

And after a few hours to catch our breaths, in came Barnes' roommate, Michael Conlon (right), to attempt to join Nevin as a finalist. Against another Cuban southpaw, Robeisy Ramirez, Conlon was probably hard-done by in trailing by 4 points after the opening two sessions. In a despairing final round, Conlon turned his back and was made to pay, a standing count the final nail in the coffin as his journey ended with a 20-10 defeat. To say Conlon's bronze was a disappointment seems insane, but that tells you something about both Conlon, and the success of our nation in the squared circle.

Nevin carries the flag tomorrow. 3 Olympic medallists will watch from the outside - the gold of Taylor a glinting reminder of what is at stake.

It Was The Best Of Times, It Was The Blurst Of Times

Heartbreak for Barnes, Joy for Nevin

It may not be Baltimore, gentlemen, but the Gods will not save you. Sport, and the Olympics, might throw up a few great stories every once in a while, but there is no sentiment, no predetermined fairytales. Fate is nothing but a mirage, destiny an American volleyball player.

The boxing ring is an unforgiving stage; a roped-in venue for the bravest of athletes, the captive combatants that know they will step out triumphant in victory or crushed in defeat. In a reminder of the wild, emotional and unpredictable nature of sport, we experienced both within 25 minutes.

Paddy Barnes (right) picked up a bronze medal in Beijing, and immediately announced that "bronze is for losers". He came around a little since, granted, but it is still a reflection of the sort of spirit and mentality required to reach these levels of sport. Four years ago, he was beaten 15-0. In London, he was barely even beaten. 15-15 after three rounds against his former conqueror Zou Shiming, a countback of 45-44 was in favour of the Chinese fighter and Irish hearts were broken.

In truth, Barnes' performance against the World and Olympic champion may have been the best Irish performance of the Games, even taking into account the Golden Girl who triumphed yesterday. Bustling and busy, he banged to the body and head, but struggled - as everyone does - with Zou's reach and slickness. Barnes made the fight, and was magnanimous in defeat. Inconsolable, of course, but he has matured along with his skills in the past four years. Ireland's first medallist in consecutive Olympics deserves all the plaudits he will receive.

I, frankly, felt as though I'd taken a few of those Barnes body shots - sickened, I was. But if we needed cheering up, we didn't have to wait long. Mullingar's John Joe Nevin (left) - a teammate of Barnes in Beijing - became the second Irish fighter to grab a final berth with a fabulous win over reigning World Champion Lazaro Alvarez Estrada. A 19-14 victory was the very least Nevin deserved, as he peppered the Cuban with right hands throughout the bout. His performance was truly outstanding, though he will need to pull another big one out of the bag tomorrow night -he will meet home fighter Luke Campbell in the final. Campbell was victorious the last time they met, but if Nevin produces more of what we saw today, another Irish gold is a more-than-distinct possibility.

'Lympic Ladies #18 - Romy Tarangul

I was, it is reasonable to say, rather critical of judo earlier in these Games. I stand by it, too; a pair of mildly irked folk in bathrobes pulling and tugging at one another does not constitute a sport for me. I may, however, reconsider my opposition to watching the sport if one particular woman is playing: the delectable Romy Tarangul.

Romy isn't quite a beastly fighting machine - in fact, she competes in one of the lightest weight categories and stands a petite 5'3. She is also, it should be pointed out, absolutely gorgeous, to the point that she posed for German Playboy a few years ago. I know, you figure the Germans aren't exactly the most fun in the world, and you might well be right, but if there's one thing that the foreign film section of the library has taught me it's that the Germans know sex.

As in the traditional Playboy way, the pics are nude. In my traditional ham-fisted Luddite way, I can't figure out how to have one of those 'click here for more' jobbies, and I know some of you will be reading this at work. So I've gone to the trouble of drawing underwear on her. If you're not happy, I'm sure you can navigate your way to google images and help yourself.

The Deirdre-Ryan-Tribute Blog - Irish at the Olympics: Day 13

Joey Fatone. George Lazenby. This chick. There is something pretty difficult about being 'the other one', knowing that no matter what you do, everyone's attention is elsewhere. So tonight, I would like to pay respect to the lovely Deirdre Ryan.

As well as being a fine athlete, Deirdre is actually a fine looking girl; probably the only company for Melanie Nocher and Tori Pena in the small group of Irish Olympians you would actually invite round to watch The Notebook and share a bottle of 'Neuf du Plonk. This, however, makes no impact whatsoever on the fact that today was never about Deirdre Ryan - she can be tall, and pretty, and talented, and all the rest, but she wasn't Katie Taylor, and that's all that mattered.

So, it was never going to be Deirdre's day. It got worse, granted, when she failed to clear 1.90m and found herself eliminated from the heats of the high jump in the Olympic Stadium this morning, but if it's any consolation, no one really noticed. The 30-year-old has a personal best of 1.95; she would have needed there or thereabouts to make the final.

There was only ever going be eyes on the ExCel this afternoon, though. Years of build-up and expectation finally came to an end as Katie Taylor took to the ring in an Olympic final. There's no point in dissecting the fight - it's already been done to death on TV, radio, twitter, crop circles, smoke signals and any other form of communication one can think of. Suffice to say that the two-point margin was the tightest victory Taylor has had in a major championship in a while, and the fight was close enough to keep breaths well and truly baited until the decision was announced. But Katie was not to be denied, the 10-8 win over Sofya Ochigava sending the ludicrously Irish crowd into raptures, and delivering Ireland's first legitimate glory in 20 years. Yes, I'm being controversial. Deal with it.

The men have their opportunity to make their finals tomorrow - what is already Ireland's best Olympics in years could soon be a record-shattering success. But that's for another day. Today is a day for glory, a day for champions: A day for Katie Taylor.

Oh, and Deirdre Ryan.

'Lympic Legends #7 - McKayla Maroney

Ardent readers of this blog will already be well aware of my love of a funny name, and therefore assume that's the reason for the inclusion of a girl named McKayla. However, I haven't yet revealed another of my loves in life - bitches.

And I don't mean that in a hiphop, urban, another-word-for-women way. I mean that I love catty, sarky, hard-nosed bitchy little balls of hate. There's nothing funnier than girls making sniping comments over each others hair, or two women gossiping about someone's boob job. Seriously cracks me up. And when it comes to being Queen Bitch of the Olympics, there is no competition. McKayla Moroney is in a league of her own.

I mean, look at that face. If you could bottle apathy, throw in a dash of hate and sprinkle it all over a look of pure vindictive judgement, you get what's pictured left. This was McKayla's reaction to her silver medal in the vault the other day, when a bad mistake resulted in her landing on her hoop and her hopes of gold disappearing quicker than her smile. Pure, unadulterated bitchface.

She was beaten to the gold by Sandra Izbasa - McKayla presumably found out when she reached the podium, as she refused to watch the Romanian perform (right). Her coach, the crowd, no-one could penetrate the wall of bitch. But the true lesson in bitchiness was reserved for the Russian gymnast who finished third.

Maria Paseka is clearly not the sharpest tool in the shed, and is woefully unable to read faces. Or body language. Maroney might as well have had "FUCK OFF stitched across her leotard, yet Paseka somehow decided this was the perfect time to go in for a hug. Maroney's reaction is possibly my favourite moment of the entire Olympics so far.

Back. The. Fuck. Up.

Bitch.

Punching Like A Girl

In August 2009, the International Olympic Committee's Executive Board announced the inclusion of women's boxing for the London 2012 Games. A side story for most, it is fair to say. But in Ireland, the countdown began. The years turned to months, the months to days, and the days to four two-minute sessions on a Thursday afternoon, until the preeminent pugilist in the female game was finally crowned. Katie Taylor, Olympic champion.

At this point, I must disclose perhaps the most controversial opinion since my preference of sparkling water to its still counterpart: I'm not sure I really like Katie Taylor. I find her religious convictions preachy and proselytizing, her personality bland and standoffish, and her voice strips the enamel from my teeth. But none of that matters. Just give her the gloves and a yard of canvas. The girl is a phenomenon.

I've already written on her achievements thus far and her standing in the pantheon of Irish sporting greats. That was two weeks ago. What we have seen in the past four days is little short of a revolution. The thought of Ireland grinding to a halt to watch Taylor would have seemed crazy a short while ago - this is the same Taylor whose World Championships triumphs were not even broadcast on television in this country. We now stand a nation mesmerized, a nation united, a nation inspired.

When women's pole vault was introduced in 2000, it was Yelena Isinbayeva (left) who became the flag bearer for the discipline, the athlete to transcend the peripheral sport in which she competed to catapult it into the global spotlight. A 24 year old from Bray has done that for women's boxing. If this was the last time we see her in a ring, then it was a fitting way to bow out. But you'd better believe this isn't the end. The actions of the greats will endure - the achievements of Katie Taylor will reach far beyond today.

'Lympic Ladies #17 - Lauren Sesselmann

Evaluating Canada's contibution to mankind can be difficult to evaluate. For every Pamela Anderson there's a Bryan Adams, for every ice-hockey a CFL. But there should be little enough argument about the quality of one of the finest exports to this Olympics - the beautiful Lauren Sesselmann.

Except there is. Lauren was actually born in the USA, and so is about as Canadian as Uncle Sam or rampant obesity. That doesn't stop Canada from claiming her as their own, though that didn't really workout well for our Lauren - her home country eliminated her adopted country at the semi-final stage on Monday evening.

The winner in that game was actually scored by previous 'Lympic Lady Alex Morgan. Speculation around 'Lympics Log HQ was that her appearance on the site just 24 hours previously inspired the win. Perhaps Sesselmann's quest for glory at Rio 2016 starts here...